Sunday, June 29, 2014

A TRUE Tree Hugger

There are so many assumptions people make about you when you start identifying yourself as a "Tree Hugger".  They think of you as an unkempt person who puts their love of plant life ahead of human relationships.  Often these people are viewed skeptically, more concerned with their image than actually doing the hard and sometimes boring work that it takes to protect the environment.
Not this Toddler! I take a bath nearly everyday and love showing off my clothes.  
There is also a tree in my front yard that has a great texture that I enjoy collecting leaves from.  I look at it as a part of the family and so I give it a hug when I am going out, just like I do for Mommy and Daddy.
Now that is a genuine reason to Hug a Tree!


Friday, June 27, 2014

Daddy does have a use but not like Mommy

I'm starting to realize the roles Mommy and Daddy can play in my life.  I have decided it is best if they keep their jobs separate but equal.  I was all about Mommy this afternoon.

Sorry Daddy, I just don't trust you to make salsa with me, or anything else for that matter.  The best you can do in this department is be a chauffeur to the Happy Meal Place.

But when it comes to talking Dinosaurs or a new Mammal, in this case one that looks like a Mouse but is genetically closer to an Elephant, Daddy has one up on Mommy.

Some Boys toss a ball with their Dads, I discuss the finer points of the Macroscelldes.
Daddy is a bit of a geek but he is still my Daddy!


Tuesday, June 24, 2014

Preparing For My Career

Everybody needs to do something when they grow-up and now I have inspiration.  I have been catching some of the lectures by Thomas R. Holtz, Jr., Ph.D. on Dinosaurs via YouTube.
I have been taking notes and now give nightly lectures to Mommy and Daddy on this topic.
I have to simplify things a little bit since my parents aren't as sophisticated but I think I get my message across.
Let me put it this way.  I reduce complex concepts of paleontology into concepts the general public can understand!  Just like Dr. Holtz.
Also like Dr. Holtz I can have fun while I am teaching and fun just kicking back with friends!
Even though I currently only have an audience of Mommy and Daddy it is only going to be a matter of time before my class attendance increases.  I'm sure Dr. Holtz started small also.
Best of all, my lecture series is MY time.  "You not talk now Daddy!"

Monday, June 23, 2014

Celebrating An Institution

As an American Toddler I am slowly being acculturated to the institutions of this society.  There are some institutions I don't appreciate like "Time Out" but I just got introduced to one I do like.

Eating barbecue when it is Sunny out.

I certainly appreciated it, but what I appreciated most was Daddy's reaction.
It was like there were two little boys at the table!

Friday, June 20, 2014

Taking Some Cues From Daddy

Mommy always told me that Daddy was going to be an example to me of how to be a Man.  Well, I'm taking notes, whether he likes it or not.

Just to satisfy my curiosity I asked Daddy what was the smallest Fish in the Ocean.  Without hesitation his answer: Minnow!

Well not quite, the average Minnow is about 5 cm.  By comparison, to date the smallest known fish is actually the Paedocypris that has a length of 7.9 mm!

So I guess the first lesson on being a Man is that if you don't know the answer to something you just make it up.

One thing isn't small, Daddy's ability to exaggerate his knowledge of marine life.


Wednesday, June 18, 2014

Sizing-Up Daddy.

It might not be today, but sooner rather than later there is going to be a moment of truth, which male is going to run this herd.

I'm not ready to mount the challenge quite yet, but that doesn't mean I can't start testing Daddy's weaknesses.

I'm definitely taking notes.  When the final head to head match eventually occurs I want to know where Daddy's soft spots are going to be.
I might not have the armor of a dinosaur but my brain isn't the size of an acorn either.  Abstract thought counts for something.  When it is finally time for me to take my place as head of this herd I will be prepared!


Sunday, June 15, 2014

The Far East

Today we traveled East towards Redmond and it was everything I expected the Far East to be.  It is a truly exotic place with a distinct Russian and Indian culture as well as gigantic Bears!

What an exciting Father's Day I got to celebrate with my Daddy!  I got to go to Redmond (Russia) home of Bears, Tsars and Dostoyevsky.  But more importantly I appreciated meeting Vladlena.  
The great thing was, I was able to ingratiate myself to her entire family fairly quickly.  Despite the broken English everyone appreciates the universal language of Toddler, just start talking about Dinosaurs and all cultural and language barriers disappear.  Sad people didn't realize this during the Cold War.
After that we went to celebrate Father's Day at the Marymoor Park Beer Festival . . . 
. . . but that is a story for another day.

Saturday, June 14, 2014

Creative Differences

Granted, Daddy is a necessary Ghostwriter for this blog since I still don't know how to write and my hands aren't big enough to type very fast.
Still it is JAXON'S BABYBLOG!  I will ask for your creative input when I feel like it.

Face it Daddy, I'm an artist.  I have a right to get a little hot-tempered when things aren't going in the creative direction I want.
When I have a creative meeting with Daddy where he tries to steer things away from my vision I have to rough him up a bit.
If all else fails I give him the Pachycephalosaurus Head-Butt.  

Sorry Daddy, a true artist doesn't compromise.  Think about what the Sistine Chapel would have looked like if Michelangelo had played nice!


Friday, June 13, 2014


I was hanging out at my normal gathering spot today, the University Village Jungle Gym and got to witness some ugliness.  A boy about my age asked his Father (And I use that word loosely) if Dinosaurs existed.  His Father's answer: NO.

Though there is near unanimous agreement amongst paleontologists that Dinosaurs DID exist this isn't what made me mad.  I'm sure the Father knew they existed, he was just to lazy to go into an explanation of extinction.  Hey, life isn't always pretty, deal with it.

I was very disappointed to put it mildly.  How could a child grow-up in a house where Dinosaurs aren't talked about 100% of the time!

Tuesday, June 10, 2014

The Big House

I basically got sent to jail tonight.  Daddy only read me three books and sent me to bed.  I've realized there isn't much of a point in trying to escape either.  I'd just get sent back anyway.

Well, as long as I am here I might as well Play The Blues.

"Swing low . . ."

Friday, June 6, 2014


Just the word strikes fear into me.  I really don't know what it means but sometimes not knowing is scarier than knowing.

Thus when Daddy threatened to GROUND me it caused all sorts of anxiety.  I have heard this happens to other kids when they are bad so I know it isn't good.  I had to bite down on my Sauropoda to relieve the anxiety.

I spent the rest of the night appealing to the love of my Mommy.  I figured if I could remind her how much she loved me she would intervene if Daddy tried to actually GROUND me. 

Sometimes to protect yourself you need to play one parent against another.

Wednesday, June 4, 2014

Visiting Baby Carter

My friend Erika had her baby recently and I finally got a chance to visit him.  Hello Baby Carter!

I totally bonded.  Best of all, since I had watched Erika through the process I knew he was hers and wouldn't be following me home.

Still . . . we did get along pretty well.  I mean, some people buy new cars or take home dogs on a whim.  
On the way home I gave in to temptation.  
Jaxon: "Mommy, can I have a Baby Carter"
Mommy: "It would be a lot of work"
Jaxon: "It would be a lot of work for YOU Mommy"

Sunday, June 1, 2014

Sadly, You can win an argument but still not get what you want!

After watching some National Geographic today I was sold.

"Mommy, me want a Honey Badger as a pet"

I mean, anything related to an Otter has got to be snugly.  Mommy's response was less positive.  
Mommy: "It would tear up the house"
Jaxon: "It could live in the back yard"
Mommy: "It wouldn't play well with the Dogs and Cats in the neighborhood"
Jaxon: "It would win any fight"

Every objection I had a response to, but I'm still not getting my Honey Badger!

Adults focus way too much on emotion instead of pure logic.